Decorative Plumbing

-- it has to have some purpose, right?

Sunday, June 01, 2008

I think my RE is giving up on me

...or already has, I don't know. And I don't know how I feel about this.

I met with him last week, and the meeting was a bit weird. I asked him about another HSG (maybe coupled with Letrozole) because at this point I am mostly interested in plumbing maintenance. His response? Donor Eggs?! I had thought we had put this option to rest for the time being. Actually, thinking about his response makes me much more angry now than I was during the meeting. Funny how that works.

Anyway, he would be okay with another HSG but if there is evidence of scarring (particularly the tubes), he is not going to do anything about it. He doesn't want to subject me to any more (unnecessary) surgery. See, why I feel he's giving up on me?

He may be right, I may never get pregnant again in my life (without donor eggs). But I am so tired of having my eggs be blamed for all the failures. I may be delusional, but I think without the Asherman's I may have had a chance a couple of years ago. My eggs were not always crappy. And last year, after a clean-up and with an open tube, I did manage to become pregnant. Probably a bad egg, but good enough to implant at least.

I don't know where I am going with this. I don't even know why this all bothers me so much. After four years of secondary infertility I should be able to finally accept our three person family.

4 Comments:

At 1:33 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I had a long comment going here but then I deleted it as there isn't much I can say that is going to help, is there?
I do know how much SIF can take out of you and how difficult it is to try and let go of something that you want so badly.
So no advice from here but I am thinking of you (and hoping beyond hope as it's hard not too after my experiences and the unlikeliness that I would have been able to have a second child).
DinoD

 
At 11:14 AM, Blogger Shelli said...

aaaah, the bad eggs defense. I know it well...

as you know, sort of in the same boat as you... approaching 4 years trying for #2.

I don't think our doctors have really given up on us (but we do take it so personally, don't we?). I think the difference is they want to FIX something and when you run out of things to fix...

I think we will know when the end is near. Until then, we keep trying, because if there is anything worse than trying and failing, it's regreting not trying at all.

Hang in there.

 
At 5:57 PM, Blogger Jbeeky said...

It never goes away. I just had someone offer me a grant opporunity and of course I said no and thought, "because soon I will be....". Now with this adoption, this will eventually be a sentence I can say but I AM SO FUCKING TIRED OF SAYING IT! I have been trying to finish my family for ten years now and I hear ya sister!

 
At 1:33 AM, Anonymous jadedowdle said...

Nice and i heard that these days decorative plumbing are much developed in newly luxury constructions & home based constructions too.

All plumbing manufacturers will engage in this industry i think.

 

Post a Comment

<< Home